New Year ~ New You
As the year 2012 comes to close I cannot help but reflect back to 2011. I can hear my brother, with his happy voice, yelling loudly that 2012 was my year! 2010-2011 had left me in a heap of dust, down, depressed, consumed with anxiety. I vowed to let 2012 be my year. I posted notes, around my house, with the affirmation, “Tough Times do not Last, Tough People Do.”
I rang in last year, sober, eyes wide open, little ability to trust, but ready to conquer the world with the few people I trusted, to guide me. I decided this was the year I would begin to conquer the fears that had dragged me down, for far too long.
In March I conquered a major fear, I competed in my first fitness competition and placed sixth, with the help of my Trainer Brandon and his beautiful wife Candice. I had never felt so good about myself prior to this. Not because I was in amazing shape, or disciplined enough to eat, without daily cheats of my kid’s food (: , but because I was able to wear bikini bottoms without hesitation, NO FEAR, was my freedom. One of my greatest fears in life, as long as I can remember was wearing bathing suit bottoms, and I conquered it, at 34 years old, and after giving birth! I know many women can relate to this fear. I only wanted to feel that confidence, from the freedom of fear, the uncertainty of believing in myself.
This led me to begin: ALY Warriors (Always Love Yourself) no longer as just a blog, or Facebook Page, but as a business. I felt driven to help others feel confident with their life, period! This started taking shape in many forms, through fitness, health, work, goal setting, accomplishing, life coaching, conquering fears, and just being happy with whom you are, creating your own joy and zeal for life. This was my path.
As the year has come to a close, with the devastation at Sandy Hook Elementary School, I have flashed back to all the negativity I had seen over my career as a cop. All of the victims I was unable to revive, the accidents, shootings/stabbings, mortality and dis-regard for human life. I felt myself falling back into a depressed state, losing the joy I had worked so hard to create. Wondering if I had made the right decisions, moving in the right direction? I left a six-figure salary to go out on my own. I had removed myself from the negativity, and disgust in my life, and now was left with just me. I began to question my worth and wonder if this was the right direction. I had to un-plug, re-organize, eat right and take the time to grieve loss.
Mentally making a mind shift and realizing I have worth, and wanting to help others live their best lives, in turn makes my dream come true. I am not Oprah, but I can dream to aspire to help others the way she has. Every one of us need a cheerleader, someone routing for him or her, encouraging him or her to take a leap of faith, knowing God has a plan for all of us…